Lydia has turned 5 months! Whoa! She has enjoyed a new game of picking up links and putting them in a container. I help guide her arm, but she does the picking up and dropping. I'm so proud of her! She is still working on rolling from back to belly. That dang arm just keeps getting in the way! She's mastered the belly to back roll. I'm not sure if she's teething or not. She drools, and drools, and drools . . . and drools. She also likes to put anything and everything in her mouth. I'm not sure if that's an exploratory thing or a teething thing. Let's hope those teeth hold out a couple months longer so that I don't have to worry about sharp teeth while I nurse. Yeowza!
She has also received her second cold. It's kind of good, to build up her immunity, but I really hate seeing my baby sick. I worry about her all night long, wondering if she's still breathing. I'm a pretty tired mamma today. I woke up like four times last night, just to check on her. We still have the BBG machine and use it a lot, but sometimes it doesn't get everything, especially when I'm going solo. She HATES it! I don't blame her. I'd hate it too. She has started recognizing the tip of the tube and starts screaming when she sees it in my hand. Then, it gets worse when I turn on the machine. She needs to be held down while being sucked out because her head moves like crazy. So, you can see my dilemma. It's hard to hold her down AND suck her out at the same time. Then, when it's done, she keeps screaming, and she looks at me like, "How could you, Mom?" I feel inadequate and like I'm a terrible mother. I know it's to help her breathe, but it's still heartbreaking. She's a trooper, though. She's still a happy girl. Not quite as happy as she normally is, but still happy and good-natured. I'm really lucky to have her, but I'm not sure I deserve such a good baby.
We're all entitled to a sad mommy moment, right? Whether we want it or not.
Wish Lydia luck that she'll get better soon!
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